Of all the texts we wrote for this site, punishment and reward proved to be the most difficult. It is what we had to write and rewrite until we could lovingly and non-judgmentally explain why both punishment and reward hinder the child’s learning and development process.
As strange as it sounds, both reward and punishment have a negative effect on the child’s psyche.
When we refer to the reward we are not referring to the positive messages with which we communicate with a child. These are absolutely necessary. They strengthen self-confidence, meet the child’s need to belong and feed his personality and work. Here we refer to rewarding in the way it is done in a normal school environment or in the home and the things the child does, the achievements he achieves, are rewarded in external ways, with a constant thumbs up for everything, or with material goods (gifts, special badges, grades, …).
Why is rewarding in this form not desirable?
- Cultivates from a very young age competition. The child is motivated to learn, with the aim of surpassing the rest.
- The young child begins to learn and work with the goal of obtaining the “prize”. So the learning process ceases to be motivated by the child’s personal interest and inner impulse.
- He learns to compare himself and to feel like a “good” or “bad” student depending on whether or not he is rewarded. When he fails to win the “prize” he becomes disillusioned and his self-confidence diminishes. At older ages, the fight for the reward can be particularly stressful for the child.
- The value of the learning process and the child’s effort is underestimated.
Accordingly, the punishment comes to be imposed either for a latent way of social behavior, or to certify the lack of knowledge (bad grades). In both cases, if the child was able to integrate into his being, either the social rules or the required knowledge, the educator and education would not be necessary.
But what does punishment do to the child?
- Weakens the love of knowledge
- Weakens the ability of self-discipline.
- Creates feelings of passive acceptance (resignation) or anger (reaction).
- It reinforces in the child the feeling of “I am not capable” (low self-confidence).
- It reinforces the feeling of “I don’t belong” in the child. The child feels marginalized.
In the Montessori classroom there is neither punishment nor reward. There is freedom with limits. The Montessori educator sees the child through the lens of love and understanding of his needs. His role is to care for and guide the child with humility.
In the Montessori classroom, the child unfolds his “wants” and turns them into “deeds”.